I have my love to keep me warm!

Well, you know the words of the old song don't you.
At present, we are deep in snow here & it's tough getting out on foot, let alone in the car.
Secret liaisons with secret lovers are doubly difficult at this time of year.
Worse still, if you made the date before the snowfall & now can't get to the rendezvous, you must be throwing things at the wall!
So, why not take the time to compose a letter to your secret lover. Write down all the things you have wanted to say, but never dared. Don't be too mushy about it, just be plain honest about your feelings.
It will help get your own head sorted about the relationship & your lover might be surprised about the depth of your feelings. They might even dare to reveal there own!
Spring is around the corner, so chin up, get your letter written, even if you never give it to them.
Have a good week.
Inkflo

How are you feeling?

I would like to wish you a Happy New Year, but I sort of think you might not be feeling much like celebrating the New Year if you've been alone and without the company of your secret love for a while.
It's been hard, I know, everyone is full of the festive spirit and bonhomie, whilst you have been sitting around gorging on anything that will fill your need for comfort and warmth.
Still, it's a New Year and a time for you to consider what may lie ahead in 2012.
Firstly, do you want to carry on with this secret love affair and it's dangerous liaisons?
If you answer yes, then you will be hoping no doubt for more time and better quality time with your secret lover.
You might also be reflecting on the heartache, loneliness and just darned inconvenience of this relationship. Is it really a fair match or in truth, is it all one sided and not on yours either!
Whatever you decide, I will just say one thing.
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF
It's your life and you only get one go at it.
Good luck with your decision, I hope 2012 will bring you health and happiness.
Take Care.

Secret lovers and Christmas holidays

Well, we're fast approaching that time of year again.
You know the one I mean, your secret love is out buying gifts for his wife & kids, they are all off at the weekends choosing the family tree, probably enjoying some time at the outdoor ice rink or christmas market and what are you doing?
Most likely sitting moping at home, having miserable thoughts about your secret lover and wishing it was you that he was whisking around all those fun holiday places.
Let's be honest, that's not going to happen is it? So, what do you do to keep your spirits up at this time of year?
Firstly, remember that you are entitled to a life outside this extra marital relationship. He won't be having less fun with the family because he knows you can't join in, so get up off your butt and make some enjoyment for yourself.
If you are totally self centred and self pitying, then you will probably go & splurge on a new outfit, hairdo or massive box of candy.
STOP! Think for a moment ...
You really aren't that selfish person are you?
There are masses of people out there that really do have a miserable Christmas holiday, due to poverty, illness or loneliness. You could be the one that makes a big difference to them this holiday.
You don't have to be loaded to help out at the local homeless shelter or retirement home. One more volunteer can make so much difference to these selfless workers and needy people at this time of year.
Think about your elderly neighbors, who would benefit from even a short visit or just a card this Christmas? Then, guess what, before you know it, the Christmas holiday season will be over, you won't have moped around feeling sorry for yourself and you may have given someone the best present they could have wished for ... a great big smile!
Happy Christmas.
Happy Festivus or whatever you're leaning, have a happy one!
Doesn't look like it will be a white christmas here this year!

Thanksgiving alone

Thanksgiving will soon be here, and it's no fun being withought your lover at this time.
If you have a secret lover, then the chances of you being together at Thanksgiving are probably small.
So, what do you do? Do you sit at home on your own, forcing down the turkey, thinking about what he or she may be doing? Or do you get dressed up & go out and enjoy yourself with family and friends and hope that you will be together soon.
Sitting home alone, moping without your secret lover won't make the day any easier will it? So, better to go out and enjoy yourself and at least take your mind off it.
Before you know it, the Thanksgiving holiday will be over and you will be back to your normal daily routine.
Have a great Thanksgiving.

Valentine's Day for secret lovers

Valentine's day is a very difficult one if you are secret lovers.
You really want to send a Valentine's card, but where is there that you can do this?
If you do have a place, then can you be sure that no one will intercept it & work out who the sender was?
The best thing about Valentine's Day cards though, is that many are sent worldwide with no hint of the sender in side them. If you really feel the need to make it known to your secret lover that the card came from you, then think of some small thing to put inside the card that only you two would recognise, something totally innocent that would never raise a question, but that your lover would spot in an instant.
Valentine's Day is traditionally a hearts and flowers occasion, so go ahead and send that card!

Affairs of the heart

It started with the occasional walk past my desk in the office.
A smile, a wink, the occasional light hearted comment about the weather or work.
It was nice, really nice, and I began to look forward to seeing him striding down the corridor towards me, smiling, confident.
I would quickly pat my hair or adjust my clothes, sit up straight, smile, make eye contact at the same time as him.
After a while, he would come bearing small gifts. A coffee, a sticky bun from the tea trolley, a flower from his garden, and like some inexperienced schoolgirl, I would accept them, blushing and flustered.
If one day he didn't appear, I couldn't concentrate on work, I was constantly glancing along that corridor for any small sign of him, and if by midday he hadn't paid me a visit, my lunch would be a miserable hour spent in the park alone, sandwiches thrown to the ducks.
It was during one of these achingly empty lunch breaks that I realised I had been bitten by the affair of the heart bug.
What would happen next?

My first married affair.

I was so young when I had my first affair. I was also newly married.
This may horrify some people, but the truth is that I shouldn't have married at all.
I was far too young at 19 and far too inexperienced.
Life back then was so different from today and we were all pretty naive, I can tell you.
Any man that spoke kindly to me then, especially if he paid me attention, had my undying devotion!
Sounds mad now doesn't it, but there we have it, totally true.
I met my first lover through work. He was seven years older than me, but he had a way of staring into my eyes as though there was no one else in the room.
I must have been a real pushover, but our secret meetings in his office after hours, were the most exciting I have ever known.
We made love on the carpet, and to this day, I think about the people who visited that room to hold important meetings and never knew what had occurred there the previous evening!
I'm sure that this goes on in millions of offices and stationery cupboards all over the world, but to me, at that time, it was a revelation.
Then, we took it even further....
To be continued.